Remember When Hillary And James Comey Conspired To Steal Election From Herself? Trump LOLsuit Remembers!

How will he dirty up the House 1/6 Committee report? How won't he?

To call the pile of conspiratorial gibberish Donald Trump excreted onto the federal docket yesterday a "lawsuit" is to miss the point. Sure, he ponied up the $402 fee so he could file a case in Florida captioned Trump v. Clinton,suing his nemesis for doing THE RICO by "orchestrat[ing] a malicious conspiracy to disseminate patently false and injurious information about Donald J. Trump and his campaign, all in the hopes of destroying his life, his political career and rigging the 2016 Presidential Election."

But no one believes that 108 pages of 8chan-level nutbaggery alleging that Hillary Clinton presided over a vast conspiracy to weaponize the Democratic National Committee and the FBI to ruin Donald Trump's life is going to lead to a $74 million payout. Because this isn't really a lawsuit. It's counterprogramming for the upcoming report from the House January 6 Select Committee, and the parallels to the House's project are uncanny.

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Tucker Should Probably Just Give His Monologues In Russian From Now On

Tucker's drumbeat on behalf of Mother Russia's war continues.

In technical geopolitical terms, things this week are getting stressy with the Russia/Ukraine situation. Around 8,500 American troops have been put on "heightened alert," and everybody's as worried as ever that Russia is going to invade. So of course, Tucker Carlson, the most popular spokesmodel for Russian propaganda on the Fox News network, put on a slinky thing last night and showed us some more Russian propaganda.

This was pretty impressive, because in order to do this, he had to take a break from the most important issue in America, which is explaining how his masculinity is threatened if he can't separate his M&Ms by color so he doesn't inadvertently eat a male M&M and accidentally get hard-shelled candy cock in his mouth. (What? Isn't that what he's been complaining about? It's something about M&Ms and his shriveled masculinity.)

It seems like Tucker's beating the drums of war almost every night, but in support of an American enemy that wants to invade and steal our ally. Here's just a smidge from last night:

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Republicans Suddenly 'Very Interested' In 'Helping' to 'Reform' The Electoral Count Act

Oh, sure, you bet.

Last night Axios cheerfully reported that reforms to the Electoral Count Act are picking up "growing bipartisan support," as the GOP warms to the idea of clarifying ambiguities in the law that governs Electoral College tabulation. Because apparently this is Axios's first rodeo.

Just a year ago Republicans were pretending Mike Pence had the unilateral authority to reject 18 million votes from five swing states. And now we're supposed to accept that they want to help reform the process? You bet!

Surely this has nothing to do with the fact that the Republican party -- which hasn't won a majority of the popular vote in a presidential election since 2004 -- is planning to allow Republican legislatures to seize control of the electoral process to ensure that their preferred candidate takes their states' electoral votes? Heaven forfend!

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Paul Manafort Wants A Redemption Tour? F*ck Off, Let's Talk About His Russian Spy BFF Some More

Really, we can just copy/paste this every time he gives an interview.

Oh good, it's time for a redemption tour from Paul Manafort. Is anyone interested in that? Is there some constituency out there for Manafort? Are MAGA mouthbreathers dying to sound out the words in his forthcoming book, Political Prisoner: Persecuted, Prosecuted, but not Silenced — LOL — which reportedly comes out in August? (By the way, fuck Simon & Schuster for publishing that dogshit. Mueller prosecutor Andrew Weissmann notes that if Manafort receives dollars for this book, he could be in violation of his plea deal, which doesn't go away just because he was pardoned.)

Manafort went on "Hannity" last night looking like a sickly cartoon character televangelist Liberace fuck-clown, and oh boy, what Kremlin-pleasing bullshit.

During the interview there was this hilarious moment when Manafort talked about how weird it was in the fall of 2016 when the media started reporting on alleged Russian collusion with the Trump campaign. (Remember that it is now gospel in the North Korean news lady world of Fox News that all Russian collusion allegations have been proven to be a hoax, even though the then-Republican led Senate Intelligence Committee released a report in 2020 that revealed massive collusion between the Trump campaign and Russian actors.)

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